I would give her her own pot, her own spoon, and since she's pretty smart, something in the pot. It worked like a charm. She was happy, and stirred, and stirred, and stirred.
Except, I chose to put dry lentils in the pot. And apparently those are good.
In addition to being tasty, they also make great noises when dropped on the floor (no picture available). So my plan mostly worked. Next time she'll be cooking Cheerios.
An additional bonus: later after the floor was coated with lentils, so were her feet. That could be uncomfortable unless you walk on your toes. Ta-da! New skill acquired.
note: the scream and crying tend to be a making-dinner-thing. In most instances she yells a little, then moves on with her life.